What’s Proper Wedding $$$ Gift?

It’s been ten years since I was part of a couple, one that lasted a happy 55 years.

But after my my husband died, I learned to “go it alone” to social and family events. It may have been easier for me because, as a journalist, I had gone alone to cover events in all kinds of places. So I have never, and still don’t feel self conscious when I appear without an escort anywhere.

(As I often say, “I’m not lonely. I”M there.”)

And since I was employed and independent most of my adult life, my survival in widowhood may have been easier than some others’.

But there always are questions to consider and answer. Take a distant relative’s recent wedding:

  1. Do I stay overnight with the group in a downtown hotel because I live in a suburb?

2. How much should a widow give as a gift when she attends alone?

Fortunately, if one can afford it, both are easily answered spot.

It was far less expensive to hire a  driver to take me home after the event than it would have been to say overnight downtown. Also, I had the advantage of being in my own bed, not having to bring a bag with night clothes, etc. to the party.

I checked the Internet to answer the money question and, since I had already sent a shower gift, the suggested amount for a person attending alone these days seems to be $75-$100 if he or she can afford that. ($150 will do if you bring a guest.)

That’s certainly changed since my wedding when we were thrilled to receive a silver-plated butter dish, hoping we would someday  be able to buy butter instead of oleo to put in it.