To Give or Not to Give–and How Much?

A group of us were coming home from a party last weekend when one member of our widows’ group opined that the holidays were taking a woeful toll on her budget.

“My husband and I got into the habit of writing a check for one set amount to each member of our family for every birthdays and for Christmas,” she said. ” But now that he’s gone and I live on a careful budget, the holidays have become too expensive for me. But how do I stop something we’ve done for many years?”

You tell the family members your situation and explain you are making changes and tell them what  you’ve decided to do instead. I’m sure none of them want you to make daily sacrifices in order to hand out gifts you no longer can afford.

One other in our group said she had faced the same situation and told her grown children she was no longer giving money to them on special occasions so she can afford to continue doing so to all the new, younger members of the family.

Another said she had spoken up too, and now gives half as much to everyone as she had doled out previously.

It’s that simple.

True love between parents and children shouldn’t depend upon payment.

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